About this booklet
This page provides information about the Spiritual Care and Chaplaincy Bereavement Support Service available to patients, families, visitors and carers at NHS Golden Jubilee.
Bereavement Support
Bereavement can be an overwhelming and extremely painful experience.
Although grief is a normal response to the loss of a loved one, the strength and unpredictability of the feelings and emotions that accompany it can be bewildering and somewhat frightening.
Emotions people may experience during their grief journey
- Shock: It may take a while to realise what has happened. Shock can make you feel numb. Some people may initially carry on like nothing has happened and then realise the person who has died is not coming back. Others can feel disorientated and find it difficult to adjust.
- Pain: Following bereavement, feelings of pain and distress can overwhelm us and seem frightening.
- Anger: It is common for bereaved people to feel angry. Whether we are angry with the person who has died or with ourselves, it is a completely natural emotion, typical of the grieving process.
- Guilt: Guilt is another common reaction. Guilt at feeling angry, or somehow, thinking we are directly or indirectly to blame for the person’s death. Or guilt may be around a difficult or confusing relationship with the person who has died, or feeling you did not do enough to help them when they were alive.
- Low mood and depression: Those who are bereaved may experience feelings of depression following the death of someone close. And for some it may seem like life no longer holds any meaning.
- Confusion and longing: Some have said that they can hear or see the person who has died. This is
a common experience and is because the brain is trying to process the death and acknowledge the finality of it.
How others react to our grieving
- Some people find it difficult to know what to say or are worried they may
say the wrong thing. This can be difficult as we want to talk about it. - “I should be over it by now”: Sometimes other people and society’s reaction to grief means that we do not give ourselves permission to get upset or talk about it to others. A common phrase is, “I should be
over it by now”. This can have an impact on our process of grieving.
Please remember that it can take many months, and often several years, to work through grief. Unfortunately, there is no quick fix. The experience is also different for each individual and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. We simply all do what we must do in our own way.
